RECAP: Fifth Avenue Meltdown. PENS LOSE.

 
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Basically this was Game 8 from last year's playoff series. The Penguins outplayed the Canadiens at points, outshot them by a wide margain. But the Canadiens got big-time goaltending (Carey Price? really?) and capitalized on the few chances they had.
 
It was a vicious, physical game.
 
The Penguins had the game all but wrapped up with two minutes left, but then CEC witnessed its first of what will be many meltdown moments. Really,just a flabbergasting ending.
 
So while winning would be able to mask some of the Penguins early season faults, losing magnifies them. That's the NHL. After games like this, you have to find that solid middle ground between freaking out about everything and knowing where the weakness are.
 
Gotta move on from it.
And New Jersey on Monday ain't no picnic.
 
This one video changed our outlook on everything. So we don't even care about this loss:
 
 
Thanks to Greg from Bellevue for that. Seriously haven't laughed that hard in awhile.
 
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Mark S., RussMuffin, Nate K, Knitting Lady
 
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Some guy named David Toole came out to sing the anthems.
He was steady and consistent, wasn't into himself.
Too bad he sang "that the flag was still there."
Whatev. Jimerson was probably banging Toole's girlfriend.
 
Pre-game Malkin interview is pretty good. [ KISS Freak Show ]
 
 
http://lh3.ggpht.com/_fw7iF68JR8k/TLE29-jW58I/AAAAAAABaY4/CzIemx3Pikk/First.png
 
Crosby was flying early.
Forgot how much you hated PK Subban until you saw his number 76 on the ice.
 
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What a dick.
 
FSN had their first ridiculous cut shot of the season early on when Tom Pyatt carries it down low.
FSN cuts to a corner camera shot just as Pyatt flings one at the net. No one even sees the shot.
Guaranteed, if Zapruder worked for FSN, he would have cut to a shot of a cloud right after JFK was shot.
 
Seriously, though. How does FSN not get the memo on this? The ratings aren't high because of the broadcast. They are high because people like hockey. This is what happens when there isn't a competitive TV market. If we had the means, we could produce a hockey broadcast. Hire us as producers, FSN. $50 grand each. Sold.
 
Rupp goes to the box for something. A lot of penalties coming from scrums in front of the goaltenders.
Pens kill it. Fleury flopping around.
 
Bing gets a good shot in on Subban. Too bad he didn't give him a concussion.
No lie, we seriously wish nothing but terrible things on Subban.
This is a fan blog, deal with it. Crosby's racist.
 
Lapierre takes a run at Kris Letang. Comrie fights him.
Let's not even talk about that fight.
 
PP for the Pens, though.
Subban tries to hip-check Crosby.
Then Crosby had the best chance on the PP.
 
But Carey Price kept making huge saves.
Our spellcheck actually flagged that sentence.
 
Rupp goes to the box for some bullshit call.
Yikes. Habs stretching the Pens out, getting one-timers. Killed.
 
At some point Malkin had part of the board on him:
 
http://lh4.ggpht.com/_fw7iF68JR8k/TLIKIgyTKZI/AAAAAAABabQ/hX2W_iLPYVc/1853_1286673256.jpg
Courtesy of a lot of people e-mailing it in.
 
Paul Martin went deep about 4 times in the first period.
 
Plekanec leads a rush. Fleury has no clue what he's doing.
Mike Cammalleri of course.
 
1-0. douchebag.
 
http://lh5.ggpht.com/_fw7iF68JR8k/TLIFPzxrIpI/AAAAAAABaak/I6si19Vloio/c7b1296ec2afbf6c3288487eedee670f-getty-102894493ja013_canadiens_v_penguins.jpg
Hockey's back.
 
Apparently hooking and holding Malkin won't be penalties this year.
Pens get a PP later. That opportunity goes down the runway with PK Subban.
 
Apparently it's a high stick if a guy is on his knees.
Subban's usually on his knees, so Comrie should have known better.
 
Finally a penalty is called for hooking Malkin.
 
Period Recap: More dirty shit in this first period than during the entire Flyers game.
Kennedy flying before all the penalties started happening. Michalek doesn't make mistakes.
 
 
 
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Pens start the second period on the powerplay, which sounded like it was sponsored by Powerball.
 
Soupcan returns.
Shocking to see him after this:
 
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Dive city
 
4-on-3 powerplay. Pens were scattershot.
Then Malkin gets it and slows shit down.
He feeds Crosby. Before Crosby even got the pass, you knew it was going back to Geno.
Price gets over, but he sucks.
 
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1-1. Not on the powerplay.
 
Right after that, one of the munchkins were headed to the box.
Pens smelled blood. Nope.
 
Soupcan was back.
He slew-foots Kunitz or somebody in front.
Then he hits a pipe.
 
Lapierre slews Orpik. Jesus.
Then Lapierre coaxes Talbot into taking a penalty. What a dick.
 
Best part of this was that when Lapierre realized he was on the JumboTron, he gave a shit-eating grin and a "wooooo" to the screen. Great moment.
 
Pens kill it that Talbot crap.
 
Letang leads a rush up ice.
FSN uses the dasher cam. We almost saw the play develop.
Comrie gets hauled down later. Penalty.
 
Pens on the PP.
FSN couldn't help themselves and they cut to a bizarre camera between the benches.
Whistle blows, and no one knows why. Habs too many men.
 
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On the Pens 5-on-3, no one was doing anything.
Comrie was like, Jesus, get it to the net.
Comrie finally gets the puck and immediately took it to the net. Nice.
Saucers it to Sid. Price saves.
 
Powerplay is a nightmare.
 
Period Recap: Tangradi wrecked Cammalleri. All that matters.
Have to score on that 5-on-3.
 
http://lh4.ggpht.com/_fw7iF68JR8k/TLIW_0Se-aI/AAAAAAABaco/wa2GI0EsBDM/3f6e30b2e5d9a4060d5da1b845f70cd6-getty-102894493ja017_canadiens_v_penguins.jpg
 
 
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Ben Lovejoy goes in for a puck during the line change.
But wait. Fans have to see Max Talbot get on the bench for some reason.
Talbot did have a good shift, though. HBO must have been around.
 
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Then we lose the FSN feed.
Or maybe FSN just did a dramatic cut shot to the outside of the arena on purpose during the play.
Wouldn't put it past them.
 
Thanks to everyone who sent that screenshot in.
 
It was time to put on the lab coat.
Cooke comes into the zone, feeds it to the test tube.
 
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Meniscus in your mouth. 2-1.
Another great part of the JumboTron: It really captured Mark Letestu being as surprised as anyone that he scored.
 
 
Right after that, Tangradi and Malkin almost team up for one.
Everything is going great. Thinking about how solid Lestestu is.
 
Tick tock.
Pens killing time in the Habs' zone.
 
Then…
 
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3-2 Habs.
 
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What the hell just happened? Montreal scored on a deflection. And then Fleury lets in a garbage goal.
 
Then Dan Bylsma pulls the goalie with 1:30 left with Matt Cooke and TK on the ice.
Meltdown all around. Did Bylsma know he had a timeout? We'll never know.
 
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GAME.
 
 
Some other things:
 
– Another special interview program with Sidney Crosby? The most boring program on television. Sorry.
Dan Potash should still be getting an Emmy somewhere.
 
– Versus didn't take advantage of this AGH cam. Great shots.
FSN labels it as the AGH cam. Whatever that is. Someone help us on this.
 
– A secret lies with Paul Martin.
 
– Tangradi is deceptively quick. He's no Usain Bolt, though.
 
– Rumors of the Reuse the Igloo Guy shining a laser in MAF's eyes have neither been confirmed nor denied.
 
– Woke up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat and had to run to GetGo to buy a Powerball ticket.
No clue why.
 
– KDKA announced today that they have assigned a traffic helicopter to man CONSOL Energy Center on game nights.
 
Suck it.
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