We will give $100 to whoever can prove that they predicted Mark Letestu and Alex Goligoski would be carrying the Pens through the first 5 games of the season.

It was the most emotional game of the season thus far.
Opening night of CONSOL had nothing on this shit.
We had goals being scored by jobbers.
We had a villain arise in Blake Comeau.
We had animosity toward referees.
We wondered how a player can allow himself to take three goalie-interference calls in one game.
And we actually had a powerplay goal.
But it still doesn't dull the pain that the Penguins barely beat an Islanders team that dressed a minor-league hockey team.  And it doesn't dull the pain that the hooking call in overtime was trash.
This is where we are, though.
This is the best part of the season: Embracing the fact that the team completely sucks right now.
Feed off the hate; embrace it.
We say this having faith that the Pens will get it together somewhere around Feburary.
If they don't, we'll just make fun of the Pens arena announcer and David Morehouse.
Matt S., Fiddy14, Heath City, SK360, HandOfGodard
Johnson having to make a couple of saves early.
Then Godard drops the gloves with Wyatt Earp. Good fight.
Hopefully other people saw this, but when Kris Letang was able to step into that one slapper early, Doug Weight was out there as the first Islander in the way of the shot. Weight just decided to flamingo and cover his face. He's the Islanders' captain.
Matt Cooke heads to the box for doing some flying backflip into DiPietro.
It was gonna be Brent Johnson's first chance of the night to shine.
Didn't have to do much on the PK. Killed.
Tyler Kennedy gets tripped up, and the Pens get a PP.
The powerplay didn't look too bad.
Big Dog takes a high stick. Pens get another 4 minutes on the PP.
Islanders had the best chance during those 4 minutes.
The boos rain down at the end of the PP. Man.
But the Underpants Gnomes have figured out the equation for the PP.
Period recap: 6 minutes on the PP.
Islanders had best scoring chance of the period.
Scoring chances started coming from everywhere early.
Isles had something. Then Malkin couldn't redirect one into the net. Was starting to believe CONSOL was cursed.
Then Malkin gets away with a high stick.
Later on that same play, Rupp backhands some trash into the net. 1-0.
The crowd was into it.
The Pens fed off it. Ryan Mill starts yelling about something.
Letestu makes an unreal chip behind the net to Big Dog.
He circles and fires it to the net. Hits some shit. 2-0.
Where would the Pens be without Mark Letestu?
Making more plays than Shakespeare.
Making more plays than Crosby.
Blake Comeau carries the puck into the Pens' zone, and Kris Letang throws his shoulder into him.
Comeau falls down like he got shot. Josh Bailey starts punching Letang.
Letang somehow gets a 5-minute major and a game misconduct for…playing hockey?
–someone in cblog?–
With this theatrical performance, Blake Comeau has officially become a villain.
He returned on the PP and assisted on both of the Isles' goals.
And he got the third star of the game. Suck our balls.
Islanders score. 2-1.
Josh Bailey, who attacked Kris Letang, should have been tossed
Talbot gets tripped up.
Islanders score again. 2-2.
Period recap: Wheels fell off.
At the end of the period, Eaton and Malkin pretended to face-wash each other in a scrum.
It was the most entertaining part of the game up to that point.
FSN apparently didn't even know it happened.
Too busy planning how to miss the next offensive-zone faceoff.
Been watching hockey a long time, and it is still kind of hard to comprehend the third period.
First off, Matt Cooke just loses it. He takes two goalie-interference penalties. Bizarre.
Yes, Rick DiPietro was making gayer dives than Louganis.
And, yes, that third call was kind of whatev.
Regardless, you can't do that shit.
Thank God Dan Bylsma had Tyler Kennedy to put in. So sick of it.
Some dude named Tatanka basically stuck his balls in Crosby's mouth during the third.
Won like 40 faceoffs against Bing.
The Isles can't do anything on their powerplay.
Johnson makes some big-time saves.
One goal for the Isles, and CEC would have collapsed in on itself.
The Isles take another too many men penalty.
The powerplay gets worse. Doesn't even look like hockey.
Should be allowed to decline penalties and just let time tick off.
Crosby takes some low-percentage shot. Malkin is lost.
With about two minutes left in the game, getting a point was sounding good.
But then Engelland gets jobbed on a call…a call that doesn't get called in the playoffs.
Maybe the biggest penalty kill of the season. No clue how that's possible.
BJ comes up roses with a huge save early on the PK.
Finally the period ends. OT.
Isles come out for the win. Horrible feeling.
Pens successfully clear it and move into the Isles' zone.
The referee out at center ice, the one who jobbed Engelland, calls some phantom hooking call on the Islanders.
Still hard to contemplate.
Regardless, it was HEYYYYYYYYYYY FANNNNNNS time.
No confidence at all on the powerplay.
But finally…
On the replay check out the guy in the yellow.
He had his hands up before Go-Go even took the shot. Ballsy move.

Great pic from Chris Z.

— Sometime during CONSOL's existence, a little kid will get punched in the face when they are sitting in Suite 66 and the players are coming back in after a tough period. Book it.
— The powerplay sucks.
Shouldn't they have hired a coach for this?
Do they work on the powerplay? Very curious about this.
— Brent Johnson.
— Crosby is playing like garbage. Has to be hurt.
— Guy sitting behind Disco had a sweater/shirt combo going on. Get real.
— Pens play in 8 minutes. Almost literally.