E-mailer Greg unloads on TSN

Like every other reputable hockey news site on the Internet, TSN is doing their own day-by-day look at each team as the days slowly crawl to opening night.
They are ranking the Pens 13th-best in the league.
Before we could even get a crack at it, GREG e-mailed us with everything we'd want to say.
TSN in red. GREG in bold.
"Sergei Gonchar, Alex Ponikarovsky, Bill Guerin, Ruslan Fedotenko, Jay McKee, Jordan Leopold and Mark Eaton all taking their talents elsewhere."

—  Talents?  What part of Ponikarovsky's pathetic performance did they miss?  When was the last time McKee dressed as a Penguin?  Eaton, Leopold and Gonchar were replaced and/or upgraded by the arrival of Martin and Michaelek.  Guerin is a year older and slower.  He's going to slow down whatever team he lands on.  Don't even get me started on Fedotenko.

"With Staal nursing a foot injury and the departure of veterans Guerin, Ponikarovski and Fedotenko; Pascal Dupuis
enters camp as the top returning offensive weapon outside the big two in the Penguins arsenal.  That's not good.  When the team is at full health, they are extremely strong down the middle; however they remain woefully short of talent on the wings."

—  Again here, wings.  It's all about wings.  We've needed wings for the past 3 years since the departure of HOOOSSSSAAAA.  And look at where that got us.  A goddamn Stanley Cup.  This is pure disrespect for the Penguins.  They have proved time and time again that they don't create scoring off the wings.  They create scoring off of the odd-man rush, with a point man coming in late, or the third winger peeling up to the high slot.  This is why other team's fear our speed and dangles.  Crosby and Malkin can leave anyone hanging in their wake, creating either an odd-man break or an easy rush to the net.  Our style of play does not require a world-class sniper.

The article goes on to talk about the loss of Gonchar, and I suppose I can't argue that.  When he came here I remember the pure hatred for him from the crowd.  But he redeemed himself in what was a movie-worthy saga of pain, hardship, and ultimately victory.  Here is where TSN loses credibility with me:

"Hockey fans have been waiting for a breakout campaign from Jordan Staal since his phenomenal rookie season that nearly saw him reach the 30 goal plateau."

—  Jordan Staal?  After you clearly say that he's nursing a foot injury?  Somebody who is missing training camp, has been injured all summer, and is going to have a rough season as it is, is going to break out this season?

This was meant to be.
Because when we headed to the TSN article that Greg linked us to, we got blasted with this ad:
what are the odds.
Liked that show the first time…when it was Two Guys, a Girl, and a Pizza Place.
Don't even know the premise of it.  Don't care.  It sucks.
But we'll take a stab at it.
The three people are best friends and hang out at a diner.
The geek on the right is nervous around women and is good at math.
The guy on the left is the "nicest guy ever" but ends up getting used by women.
The blonde with big boobs just walks around doing shit.
Eventually, big boobs and nicest guy will see true love was in front of them all along.
While the guy on the right kills himself.