The Montreal Screw Job. PENS WIN.


When the Internet wakes up today, all we will hear about is the blown call from the refs that would have tied the game for the Habs. You won’t hear about the awful call midway through the second period on Tenk, which was one of the worst penalty calls in about five years.

No, the Pens attempting nearly 80 shots, and actually registering 41, won’t get the headlines.
This will:
Was it a bad call? Of course it was.
Didn’t even know there was a ref named Chris Lee.
But, hey, the dude lost sight of the puck.
But for us, that call finally makes up for that blown Pens/Devils game a few years ago when the Pens got screwed out of like nine goals.

Whatever the case, this game was a reminder of what the world champs can do. Probably one of the best skating games of the season. Game wouldn’t have been close but Carey Price was his usual self and eventually turned into a turd.

The powerplay is just warming up. There is a pulse.

P.S. — After the jump, details about Festivus at Calico Jack’s.


Jokes in Montreal can’t get anything right:

“Went to the Pens@Habs game tonight in Montreal. It was… strange.
I’m glad we got the win, don’t get me wrong, but I’m pretty sure I lost some of my hearing with all the boos around me when that Habs goal got refused. It’s a stupid rule. Still, a rule’s a rule and I know it has happened to other teams too. A bad break is a bad break. Take it or leave it. I’ll take the win.
Here are my anthem pics, you don’t have to take em. They’re very blurry, we were sitting in the grey section of the Bell Center which is almost the nosebleeds…
Speaking of nosebleeds… the Habs fans in my section were SO drunk. At the end of the second period, there was a big fight in the section. They kicked out like 10 drunk Habs fans and their girlfriends. It was ridiculous. Some guys were bleeding pretty bad. I don’t know how it started. Probably one classless drunk called another’s girlfriend a slut or something like that…
Whatev. Only in Montreal. (which is a great city of course, but the fans are douchebags)
Last fail of life: during the pregame, they put on the jumbotron the lifetime stats of the Habs against the… what? (see joined picture)
Yep. Fail.


Game started out fast. Ice started out fast. The Pens were quick.

The Habs were getting swarmed for the first few minutes. Decent chances, but nada.

Cammalleri finally tries to make something happen, but when Scott Gomez is your only option, you panic.
no real reason for this pic, just looked cool.
The Habs finally manage a shot. The Pens say get that shit out of here and go the other way. They possess the puck for so long, people forget basic things about the game of hockey. We thought we saw Fleury on his iPhone. What lies on the far side of that red line? Is the Canadiens organization aware that it’s not the ’70s anymore so anyone who doesn’t like poutine no longer gives a shit about them?

Pens get control off a faceoff. Gonchar dumps it to the corner. What happens proves that all Russians are chess masters who can see seven moves ahead. Guerin plays catch with Dupuis, then makes a pass that violates at least five laws of physics on its way to empty space.
On a non-HD TV, Gonchar materializes from nowhere.
The Russian smote the nice Canadian boy. Somewhere Don Cherry touches himself and cries.

A Penguin 2-on-1 comes to nothing. Habs do nothing in return. Pens get control and the Canadiens zone looks like the ending to the Three Amigos, but with white jerseys. Scott Gomez makes an appearnce on his way to cash a paycheck.

The rest of the period was like watching the Harlem Globetrotters beat up a Cub Scout troop.
Could have been 9-0. But Carey Price was our El Guapo.

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Second verse, same as the first.
Max Pacioretty goes to the box for having an unreal Italian name. On to the powerplay, which means the first thing that happens is a great shorthanded chance for the other team. The power play needs Chris Bourque./die
Things started to change after that. The Habs were waking up and fighting back.  Rupp takes a penalty. Here we go….but Staal gets hooked to prevent a shorthanded breakaway. Not long into the 4-on-4, Plekanec and Malkin start jobbing each other. The loser blatantly attacks the winner, but the refs decide that Malkin should go to the box, too ,for whatever reason.

Advantage Habs. Battle on the board. Puck ends up on Dago-stini’s stick.
He avenges that ethnic slur with a snipejob.


That was Montreal’s first shot of the 2nd period, over 10 minutes in.
Pens were ahead in shots 21-8. It felt like you were playing NHL 10.

Here come the Habs. A mob ends up in front of Fleury. Naturally, a Kostitsyn is involved.
Someone jobs Fedotenko into the net and Feds gets called for intentionally dislodging it.

horrible horrible call.


Steiggy says he’s got a good feeling about a Pens shorthanded goal, so of course it’s not happening. In fact, if you didn’t already know in your bones what was about to happen, then you’ve only been a Pens fan since the end of the Steeler game.
Stop. Hamrtime.
Hitting the “prev” button on the remote and watching the Steelers for a while was the only defense.

But the Penguins fight back. Nothing fancy, just hard-hitting, aggressive hockey.
They were Disco dancing on the ice. Staal to Gonchar. Cookie redirect. 2-2.

Knew something wild was gonna happen in the third period. Maybe there were going to be boobs involved.
Little did anyone know, Gary Bettman was in his underground lair, just picking up the 1960s style red batphone to ensure the fix was still in.
Nothing happened for a long time in the third.
Price on acid, Hal Gill, futile powerplays, blah blah blah.
And then… The Dupuis Play.™
So that’s who took Fedotenko’s hands. woo
And then the fun came.
The Habs were swarming. Some jokes were probably chanting the OLE song for inspiration.
Skirmish in front of MAF. Loose puck. Goal. But wait.

Chris Lee had lost sight it and had blown the whistle.
Crowd begins RAINING boos as Lee looks like he’s contemplating Southwest airline fares.

Some clown throws his shoe on the ice.
We really want the background on that story somehow. At what point does a human being get so mad he throws a shoe?
The crowd does not stop booing the rest of the game.
They manage to crank up the intensity during stoppages.
It was really something to behold. And Pee on.
Price comes out of the net. Habs fans burned his mother alive.
picture 24
  • Put those line combos against any in the league. when koon comes back? Huge.
  • How cool was Disco talking to that ref before the third. Bought him a call somewhere in there.
  • Tomas Plekanec is a dick.
  • Carey Price’s glove is worse than Midre Cummings’.
  • And finally, a hearty welcome to all the Steelers fans entering into hockey season. We’ve missed you.